Still not sitting still: ADHD in adulthood

The classroom might have changed (or has it?).

Have "rules" or traditional methods shifted much.

Sit still

Stay focused

Do things the “right” way, one size fits all

Those of us who struggled with that in school, and perhaps at home, were often perplexed with incongruent rhetorics and realities.

Similar "rules", "norms" applied, we didn’t suddenly become “better behaved.” We just got better at masking.

Whether diagnosed or not, adults with ADHD (and others who identify as neurodivergent) often spent a huge amount of energy trying to meet unspoken expectations that echoed in classrooms:

• be compliant, not curious

• be quiet and still

• be neat

• be on time

• be less "much"

In the workplace, “disruptive” now shows up as:

• speaking passionately in a meeting and being told to “tone it down”

• missing a deadline and being labelled disorganised, despite working late into the night and other factors are at play

• realising I'm interrupting or talking to fast when my brain is firing fast, and

• being seen as rude or disrespectful jumping between tasks and being accused of lacking focus, when actually I'm hyper focusing across three projects and haven’t eaten since breakfast

  
  

The feedback can feel like déjà vu. "I'm too intense, overwhelming" "I'm too reactive" "Too sensitive" "Too much" Or worse sometimes, just not enough.

Even with a formal diagnosis, support can be hit-and-miss. Without one? You’re often seen as the “difficult” colleague, the “messy” manager, the “flaky” team member.

That model was shaped in another era. It mirrored the industrial revolution mindset of its time, structured schedules, rigid year levels, uniform content, and assessment through high-stakes testing. The goal was workforce readiness for a workforce demand that no longer exists. Compliance was rewarded. Creativity, curiosity and wellbeing were often sidelined.

This is not the world we live in anymore. In today’s classrooms and workplaces, there's a need to reflect a broader, more compassionate view of human development. With an understanding that learning is deeply affected by emotional regulation, safety and a sense of belonging. An understanding that people bring with them diverse neurological profiles, lived experiences and needs.

Trauma-informed practice, targeted design, and inclusive practices are no longer optional extras, they are essential to building environments where people can thrive.

It’s not all grim. There are classrooms and workplaces evolving, leaders learning, teams starting to embrace difference instead of just tolerating it.

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”-Albert Einstein